Sunday, May 10, 2015

To my mother,

 I  was looking through my pictures trying to find just the right one to post with my Mother's Day wishes.  I noticed that I really don't have a lot of pictures of you. I have tons of pictures of Chris and the kids and I have bunches of older photos I scanned of CT and I and Grams.  All of those photos you were taking of us because we were the center of your world.

I  thought that when the kids got a little bigger, my job would be a little easier.  Yes, being a mom isn't as physically exhausting as when they were small.  Now I find that the emotional toll of worrying about them as they become adults is so much more difficult than I ever imagined it would be.  You should know that there have been times recently that you have been my best role model in helping  decide how to handle things.  It is a strange place I am in, where I find that I empathize with my mother and my daughter  at the same moment.

Every day I see you in my mirror, and I see myself in Jessie.  How can the three of us be so different and so alike at the same time?  You, Jessie, Gram, Babe, Theresa and Tina... all of you amazing women. I hate it that it takes us all so long to figure out what we are really worth.  I love you so much, and learn more from you than you will ever know.